(Non)Planning

By this point, (most of) the biggest details are set. We have our ceremony location, my dress, our reception venue and food, our photographer, some places for people to stay, and possibly even our colors (although not decided in that order). We are talking to officiants and DJs, and have about 2 dozen library books of potential honeymoon destinations scattered throughout our house. We're 8 months and a week out. We're doing well.

But we're definitely taking our time with all the planning. People keep asking "What about the music?" "What about the flowers?" "You have a reception but no ceremony?" And people keep getting engaged -- and surpassing us in both planning and wedding dates -- but still we drift on.

Perhaps our "nonplanning" is driven by the idea of moving with the current, going with the flow, central to the "Tao Te Ching" D and I both love. (He read it, thought it might benefit this Type A attorney and gave me the "Tao of Pooh" to start.)

Perhaps we are less driven to plan because we already planned -- at least in part -- our "original" wedding, one that ended up falling through due to a wonderful vendor who shall remain nameless...

But whatever the reason, our spreadsheet and old-fashioned calendar haven't actually changed our planning speed much. We see the dates and watch them pass, Excel tells us "Yes" things are overdue, we talk about times to talk about each element. But then life gets in the way. Momentum flows against us. I leave my job. We plan a Valentine's Day vacation. We get sidetracked after we're introduced to the "Jersey Shore." (Maybe that deserves it's own entry... as if enough people haven't already said what we're thinking!)

I know our wedding will come together. I've read (and shared with D) enough wedding blog entries reminding us to enjoy the process of joining our lives and to let the little things go if they will be more stress than they're worth. This is good advice and words we want to remember as we dive deeper into the wedding planning fray. And we have little moments, like we did last weekend, when we revel in the planning. As we take a walk down a quiet country road as the sun and temperature fall, and realize that in just a few short months we will be walking here as husband and wife.



At those times, we do just what all the wise advice instructs us, enjoy our moments and remember that even if we end up having no flowers, it will all be ok.